Hey hey hey! I’m currently typing this on Microsoft Word and if you’re reading this, it means that I finally got internet connection and I’ve just cut-ed and pasted this text onto BlogSpot for all to see. Right now, my mind is quite fixed onto a game and I can’t concentrate on typing any further. Soooo, brb! Ttyl! Bbq! Sbs! Cte! Erp! Spftw!
Back.
Okay, I’ve just had the craziest idea ever! When or if I happen to get kids, ya know be pregnant and give birth and all, I want to name them after my grandparents. My maternal grandparents that is. I don’t know why. I think it’s just a way I can at least try to show a little gratitude to my grandparents. Not that I’ve never been grateful to them before. It’s just that, it’s never enough. What I’ve done will never compliment how much my grandparents have done for me since the very day I was born. Soooo yeah, it’s settled. I think.
However, there is one problem. Well, not one, a few. How am I going to get pregnant? I’m not even married nor do I want to get married. Right now that is. I mean, what if I never get married?! Then I won’t even be able to have kids. But then again, you don’t have to be married to have kids right? Hehehehe *cue evil grin*. But NOOOOOOOO! No way am I going to have kids by illegal means. As much as it may (or may not) happen, I’m so not going to have to go through life bringing up illegitimate kids. It’s a heavy burden, I tell you. Not that I’ve experienced it before. I’m just saying like in my experience of observing such situations. It’s not easy. You know?
Okay, illegitimate kids aside. Have I ever mentioned? Wait, before I continue. Let’s just make a coupla things clear. Just imagine I’m very pretty. Okay no, drop dead gorgeous. I’ve many suitors waiting in line to win my heart over and they’ve all bought a 100 carat ring EACH, waiting for me to accept them so we can get married and then have kids legally. I’m super nice, I possess (how do you spell possess?!) many great qualities, I make a great wife (and mother-to-be), I cook and clean WELL, yada yada yada. You get the drift. I’m the one-in-a-million girl that every mother wants their son to marry and then have awesome grandkids to adopt my pretty blue eyes and my sharp nose and my raven black hair and whatever other incredible facial features I don.
Hold on, my tummy hurts. I think I need to, ya know.. Bahahahaha. Brb.
I has come back! I just lost my train of thoughts. Well, not exactly lost, but more of misplaced. Hold on while I carry on game-playing and gathering back my thoughts at the same time. Ttyl.
Alrighty, as I was saying. Hmm, where was I? Oh. Imagine that I’m the perfect female that every smart, wealthy and good-looking male wants as their wife and child-carrier and every parents want as their daughter-in-law and grandchild-carrier. Let’s play pretend. Ready?
So, I was thinking. If I were lucky enough to get married and have the chance to have kids, I only want to have ONE kid or a pair of twins. In other words, ONLY ONE birth in my lifetime. No more, no less. According to a distant relative of mine, my generation has a good chance of having twins or triplets or quadruplets and so on forth. It’s quite complicated but simple to understand really. That relative of mine is currently studying some medicine-related thing overseas and she says that it’s a genetic thing. This genetic thing skips a generation after another. For example, if my grandparents or their siblings or whoever related within the same generation have had twins, then the next generation being my parents’ won’t be able to have twins. So the next generation after my parents’ (which is mine!) will be able to have twins. Get it?! No?! Yes?! Maybe?! Hmm.
Let’s commit the next 10secs to digest everything you’ve just read silently.
Tick tock. Tick tock. Tick Tock.
Following my thought of having ONLY ONE birth, I want to give birth naturally. No caesarean (how do you spell it?!) or C-section or any medicine involved. I want to do a water birth. Like, give birth in a bath tub or in some kinda of water container big enough to fit my huge ass in it. Want to know how it works? You know how the foetus (before a baby is born, it’s called a foetus.) is in the womb for nine months? The foetus is actually floating around in some kind of fluid inside its mother’s womb, or more like swimming. At the time of birth, the baby already possesses (how do you spell this?!) the natural ability to swim. Seriously, a baby can swim the very second it (sex unknown so let’s call the baby ‘it’ first alright.) squeezes out of its mother’s vagina (or some of you call it, pussy -.-). What makes a baby cry the moment it gets out of the mother’s womb is the absence of fluid around it. It feels uncomfortable being exposed to the air so it starts wailing like there’s no tomorrow.
Soooo, imagine a pregnant lady in labour sitting above the bath tub filled with water. Once the baby is born, it pops out and plonks itself into the tub filled with water. Then the most amazing thing will happen. The baby will somehow find its way up to the surface for air. How? The baby will swim! Don’t worry about the baby swimming away or sinking to the bottom of the tub, the baby’s umbilical cord is still attached to the mother, so it has no chance of escaping from its mother though I highly doubt it will because a baby escaping from its mother is probably the last thing it has on its mind. Savvy?
Once the baby swims to the surface, the gynae will grab it and the annoying wailing begins. Then all that jazz happens. Tadaa! Amazing isn’t it? Water birthing sounds really cool but the fact that it doesn’t involve any kind of medicine or anaesthetic freaks me out. But then again, no pain no gain. Anything for my baby (or babies, HAHAHA!). Right?
Okay, twins or not, I’ll make sure I’ll spoil my kid rotten but at the same time, I’ll also make sure my kid gets the best education, lands him/herself the perfect money-making job, buys me a big house, a handful of cars and filially banks in at least a 5-figure sum into my account every month to support my old age (like getting a lot of plastic surgery and erm, buying a whole bunch of things for my grandkids).
Do you know what I mean? I doubt so. I think I’m wasting my time here. I’ve revealed too much. Way too much. But then again, that’s what you get when you got a laptop but no internet connection. I just keep on typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing.. And typing and typing and typing.
I hate kids. So why do even dream of having kids and water –birthing and all? I’ve no freaking clue. It’s just a thought. It’s really a TRAIN of thought. One thought leads to another, as to a train carriage leads to another (depending on how many carriages you train has also).
I’m going to end this post already. It’s 2.43am 22nd March 2009 as I’m typing this. Bear in mind, I’m typing this all on Microsoft Word because I don’t have internet connection around where I’m currently staying. Until I go to Starbucks or something to cut and paste this all on my blog, you’ll be able to read this so fret not aight. I need to sleep now because I’ll be heading out tomorrow with my grandmother in the noon. Whoo! Starbucks here I come. Until next time,
Chao.
Back.
Okay, I’ve just had the craziest idea ever! When or if I happen to get kids, ya know be pregnant and give birth and all, I want to name them after my grandparents. My maternal grandparents that is. I don’t know why. I think it’s just a way I can at least try to show a little gratitude to my grandparents. Not that I’ve never been grateful to them before. It’s just that, it’s never enough. What I’ve done will never compliment how much my grandparents have done for me since the very day I was born. Soooo yeah, it’s settled. I think.
However, there is one problem. Well, not one, a few. How am I going to get pregnant? I’m not even married nor do I want to get married. Right now that is. I mean, what if I never get married?! Then I won’t even be able to have kids. But then again, you don’t have to be married to have kids right? Hehehehe *cue evil grin*. But NOOOOOOOO! No way am I going to have kids by illegal means. As much as it may (or may not) happen, I’m so not going to have to go through life bringing up illegitimate kids. It’s a heavy burden, I tell you. Not that I’ve experienced it before. I’m just saying like in my experience of observing such situations. It’s not easy. You know?
Okay, illegitimate kids aside. Have I ever mentioned? Wait, before I continue. Let’s just make a coupla things clear. Just imagine I’m very pretty. Okay no, drop dead gorgeous. I’ve many suitors waiting in line to win my heart over and they’ve all bought a 100 carat ring EACH, waiting for me to accept them so we can get married and then have kids legally. I’m super nice, I possess (how do you spell possess?!) many great qualities, I make a great wife (and mother-to-be), I cook and clean WELL, yada yada yada. You get the drift. I’m the one-in-a-million girl that every mother wants their son to marry and then have awesome grandkids to adopt my pretty blue eyes and my sharp nose and my raven black hair and whatever other incredible facial features I don.
Hold on, my tummy hurts. I think I need to, ya know.. Bahahahaha. Brb.
I has come back! I just lost my train of thoughts. Well, not exactly lost, but more of misplaced. Hold on while I carry on game-playing and gathering back my thoughts at the same time. Ttyl.
Alrighty, as I was saying. Hmm, where was I? Oh. Imagine that I’m the perfect female that every smart, wealthy and good-looking male wants as their wife and child-carrier and every parents want as their daughter-in-law and grandchild-carrier. Let’s play pretend. Ready?
So, I was thinking. If I were lucky enough to get married and have the chance to have kids, I only want to have ONE kid or a pair of twins. In other words, ONLY ONE birth in my lifetime. No more, no less. According to a distant relative of mine, my generation has a good chance of having twins or triplets or quadruplets and so on forth. It’s quite complicated but simple to understand really. That relative of mine is currently studying some medicine-related thing overseas and she says that it’s a genetic thing. This genetic thing skips a generation after another. For example, if my grandparents or their siblings or whoever related within the same generation have had twins, then the next generation being my parents’ won’t be able to have twins. So the next generation after my parents’ (which is mine!) will be able to have twins. Get it?! No?! Yes?! Maybe?! Hmm.
Let’s commit the next 10secs to digest everything you’ve just read silently.
Tick tock. Tick tock. Tick Tock.
Following my thought of having ONLY ONE birth, I want to give birth naturally. No caesarean (how do you spell it?!) or C-section or any medicine involved. I want to do a water birth. Like, give birth in a bath tub or in some kinda of water container big enough to fit my huge ass in it. Want to know how it works? You know how the foetus (before a baby is born, it’s called a foetus.) is in the womb for nine months? The foetus is actually floating around in some kind of fluid inside its mother’s womb, or more like swimming. At the time of birth, the baby already possesses (how do you spell this?!) the natural ability to swim. Seriously, a baby can swim the very second it (sex unknown so let’s call the baby ‘it’ first alright.) squeezes out of its mother’s vagina (or some of you call it, pussy -.-). What makes a baby cry the moment it gets out of the mother’s womb is the absence of fluid around it. It feels uncomfortable being exposed to the air so it starts wailing like there’s no tomorrow.
Soooo, imagine a pregnant lady in labour sitting above the bath tub filled with water. Once the baby is born, it pops out and plonks itself into the tub filled with water. Then the most amazing thing will happen. The baby will somehow find its way up to the surface for air. How? The baby will swim! Don’t worry about the baby swimming away or sinking to the bottom of the tub, the baby’s umbilical cord is still attached to the mother, so it has no chance of escaping from its mother though I highly doubt it will because a baby escaping from its mother is probably the last thing it has on its mind. Savvy?
Once the baby swims to the surface, the gynae will grab it and the annoying wailing begins. Then all that jazz happens. Tadaa! Amazing isn’t it? Water birthing sounds really cool but the fact that it doesn’t involve any kind of medicine or anaesthetic freaks me out. But then again, no pain no gain. Anything for my baby (or babies, HAHAHA!). Right?
Okay, twins or not, I’ll make sure I’ll spoil my kid rotten but at the same time, I’ll also make sure my kid gets the best education, lands him/herself the perfect money-making job, buys me a big house, a handful of cars and filially banks in at least a 5-figure sum into my account every month to support my old age (like getting a lot of plastic surgery and erm, buying a whole bunch of things for my grandkids).
Do you know what I mean? I doubt so. I think I’m wasting my time here. I’ve revealed too much. Way too much. But then again, that’s what you get when you got a laptop but no internet connection. I just keep on typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing and typing.. And typing and typing and typing.
I hate kids. So why do even dream of having kids and water –birthing and all? I’ve no freaking clue. It’s just a thought. It’s really a TRAIN of thought. One thought leads to another, as to a train carriage leads to another (depending on how many carriages you train has also).
I’m going to end this post already. It’s 2.43am 22nd March 2009 as I’m typing this. Bear in mind, I’m typing this all on Microsoft Word because I don’t have internet connection around where I’m currently staying. Until I go to Starbucks or something to cut and paste this all on my blog, you’ll be able to read this so fret not aight. I need to sleep now because I’ll be heading out tomorrow with my grandmother in the noon. Whoo! Starbucks here I come. Until next time,
Chao.
posted by Zakk at
2:57 PM
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